The Dead Faith
by Yojimbo Sanjuro
Summary: Royai. I forgot a disclaimer, I do not own FMA
1. Chapter 1

**The Dead Faith **

**She made a little shadow-hidden grave, **

**The day Faith died; **

Mustang had died. Or at least that's how it felt to Riza Hawkeye when he returned from the final battle with Fuhrer Bradley. She could see it. Even when he was promoted to Brigadier General, he remained passive. And then it happened. He was gone. Lieutenant Hawkeye had tried to find him, but when she realized what he had become, she froze. She had immediately gone to see the higher ups, desperate to find an excuse for why he had asked to be demoted. But she already knew.

**Therein she laid it, heard the clod's sick fall**

**And smiled aside- **

It was about 8 o'clock and the remaining members of the colonel's men and the rest of the military dogs were gone, and so silently, a single tear fell from Hawkeye's eye, falling on the pile of paperwork she had just completed.

She sat there, and began to laugh softly, finally understanding the magnitude of what had happened. And then, she was silent, as she remained bent over her desk, the only sign of emotion being the small teardrops and the small noise they made as they fell.

Then, she smiled. It was a sad kind of smile, one that was never meant to be seen by any one. She finished her work and left the office, going home to feed black hayate, and escape the memories that invaded her head.

'Corporal Mustang,' as she grimaced at what she had just said.

It still hadn't set in.

'He finally snapped,' she thought, 'and now he will try and spent the rest of his life atoning for the lives he had taken, and the sacrifices that others had made on his behalf. Havoc would never walk again, that much was painfully clear. Hughes was gone as well, killed by Lust while trying to help Roy to the every end. His dream was long forgotten, at least by most. Not by her though. Never.'

**"If less I ask," tear-blind, she mocked, "I may**

**Be less denied." **

'And Winry,' she added.

**She set a rose to blossom in her hair,**

**The day Faith died- **

She visited Hughes' grave after coming back from her trip to Roy 's post

" Roy ," she said silently mourning what the name represented.

Being a model military officer, she had never allowed herself to say the name aloud. However, she had always imagined telling him, how she felt. Saying his name over and over until dawn had broke. Following him, and making him the Fuhrer so that all his dreams would come to pass.

She thought of Maes Hughes, his lover and his friend. Hughes, who spent his dying breathe advancing Mustang's cause.

It had been fairly obvious that Hughes and Mustang had been involved in Ishbal. The night that Mustang killed the doctors, she saw the shadow of the other man within Mustang's tent. Even after Hughes had married, she could see that the mentions of his love life were a knife in the Colonel's side. It was obvious from the thankful glances he shot her whenever she hung up on Hughes.

After his death, Mustang had even forsaken his thoughts of revenge in order to follow the dream that Hughes wanted.

Then, he snapped.

**"Now glad," she said, "and free at last, I go,**

**And life is wide." **

She knew that he would probably never be the man that she had loved. She knew that he would probably never give up his desire to forsake everything that he had once stood for. But she needed to see him.

So she entered his post, a small hut in the middle of the wilderness, where he was seated in at a small wooden table. The decoration inside the hut was sparse, only having a bed, a table, a bookshelf and the table.

"Corporal," she stated as she walked towards Roy , "why?"

It wasn't a question. But as she continued to talk to him to try and make him see the light, and return to his former path, he did nothing. There was no sign that he even understood what she was talking about. She was there for hours, talking, more at him then to him, but none the less talking to him in a desperate effort to make him continue in his prior goal. But there was no response. Finally she begged him.

" Roy . Please, we need you. I need you. Come back and take over the military. Rewrite the laws and reshape the system. Do it for Hughes. Do it for Havoc," she began to tremble as she continued, and in a fait whisper she said, "Without you what is the use of me?"

With that she bent down to his eye level and kissed him, with everything she felt. All the passion and love for him she had she pored into the kiss… and yet, there was no response as he continue to stare at her vacantly.

**But through the long nights she stared into the dark, **

**And knew she lied. **

She stood up and left, falling against the door after she shut it; and for the second time in 5 years, Riza Hawkeye cried. She broke down in quiet sobs as she fell to her knees. Then after a time, she left, her cheeks still wet.

"The end," she said to herself.

She had nothing left. Her family was dead, her grand father was always busy, and Roy was now no longer existed.

But, then, she heard Roy moving to the door. He walked over to her and simply looked at her, realizing his mistake. He bent down and kissed her, as she stood there shocked. He whispered to her,"Maybe."

With this he returned to his home and Hawkeye left.

She was uncertain of what the future would bring, but, then again, isn't everyone?


	2. Chapter 2

**Alone**

**From childhood's hour I have not been  
As others were — I have not seen  
**

'Hughes, my best friend, my only friend. The two of us had always been together. As children we had been inseparable. I loved him… no we loved one another, or so I thought, and that's why his marriage had hurt me so much. But even after he was married, as he ranted about how great his life and his family were, as he twisted the knife in my heart over and over, I still loved him. I always loved him. Always needed him, certainly more than he needed me. And yet, he was always there, supporting me from the background, telling me top secret information and pushing me higher in the military. But now, when I needed him most, he was gone. How could he have betrayed me like this how could he die.'

Roy had stared at the funeral for over 15 minutes before he could work up the urge to walk over. All he could do was watch the soldiers bring Hughes body through the graveyard, watching hopelessly at the flag that covered the coffin holding his oldest dearest friend, his beloved.

Roy looked up at Lieutenant Hawkeye as she stood next to him by the head stone. As he looked in her eyes he knew what she wanted to say, just as he'd always known it. Because she would always be the constant in his life, because she loved him. He asked her then if she would always remain loyal, but even without her saying it, they both knew that she would.

And so somehow he'd found the will power to continue living.

**As others saw — I could not bring  
My passions from a common spring —  
**

'Fire,' he thought, 'my obsession and my down fall.'

He'd always known that his pyromania would hurt him one day, but he kept hoping it would never come. Until it had…

**From the same source I have not taken  
My sorrow — I could not awaken   
**

Scar had almost destroyed him. He realized this only after Lieutenant Hawkeye had saved him and chased off.

'Riza,' he thought lovingly.

Riza Hawkeye, the perfect subordinate, obedient, loyal, completely devoted, a great shot, calm and level-headed. She was in love with him. Neither of them acknowledged it, and it wasn't obvious to the rest of his officers, but they both knew she hated the military. The military had taken both her parents. She had originally been drafted into the military for the Ishbalan war, but after meeting Hughes and himself she had stayed. It had started out as pertinence for the murders she had committed, thinking that if I was made Fuhrer that I could change the world. But even then that was a pretense, because even though she knew about my relationship with Hughes, she loved me.

**My heart to joy at the same tone —  
And all I lov'd — I lov'd alone —  
**

I was glad that she knew about me and Hughes, because she helped me many times, yelling at Hughes, and shooting at times when she knew that he was twisting the knife that he'd left in my heart.

**_Then_ — in my childhood — in the dawn  
Of a most stormy life — was drawn**

Yet somehow I went on after Hughes' death, eventually becoming more determined to achieve my dream of reshaping the military.

**From ev'ry depth of good and ill  
The mystery which binds me still —   
**

'Lust,' Mustang thought angrily.

She took Hughes from him, and then, she took Havoc. He wasn't dead, and yet, he didn't seem really alive. Being paralyzed from the waist down. Before he was injured, he couldn't get a date because Roy had taken out all the girls he liked. Now, he couldn't stand because Roy hadn't reacted fast enough. Now he had screwed over Havoc once again.

**From the torrent, or the fountain —  
From the red cliff of the mountain —  
From the sun that 'round me roll'd  
In its autumn tint of gold —  
**

Yet, he had told Havoc to keep going. Roy Mustang had tried to keep moving forward. He'd Challenged the Fuhrer, and won. Then, he broke.

**From the lightning in the sky  
As it pass'd me flying by — **

He had no will left to keep going. Even as Hawkeye continued to make sure the same sequence of things occurred day after day to try and ensure his mental stability, he simply couldn't take it any more.

**From the thunder, and the storm —  
And the cloud that took the form  
**

That's when he had asked for the demotion. To pay for the sins that he committed against all the people he trusted and all the people he loved. To atone for her sins, he would eliminate all the things that he wanted and all the things that he loved, Riza Hawkeye Included.

That's why it had hurt so much when she'd shown up. Riza Hawkeye came out to the middle of nowhere to ask him to come back to the military.

That's why it burned him to sit there and stare vacantly as she spoke to him, correction, begged him to come back. She stood there, in front of him, talking to him for hours. Her voice sounding desperate, and hopeless, like life without him wasn't life for her. Because he knew that's what she thought. Still, he stood there, staring vacantly at her, pretending not to hear the desperation in her voice.

"Roy. Please, we need you. I need you. Come back and take over the military. Rewrite the laws and reshape the system. Do it for Hughes. Do it for Havoc," Riza had begun to tremble as she continued, and in a fait whisper she said, "Without you what is the use of me?"

Those were the cruelest words that he'd heard in years. 'I need you,' he thought that was the saddest thing that anyone had ever said to him, because he needed her as well.

It cut into him, because in a world without Maes Hughes, Riza was the person he loved best.

Pretending not to notice as tears weld up in her eyes.

She kissed him. She kissed him with everything that she had left. With all the emotions that he'd known for years that they each harbored for each other. And yet somehow he had managed to stay totally passive. Not responding at all, as if he hadn't noticed the piece of her soul that was dying every second that he wasn't returning the kiss.

**(When the rest of Heaven was blue)  
Of a demon in my view —**

The kiss ended and she looked into his eyes, the tears threatening to fall with each gaining second. She turned around and walked out of his hut; falling against the door as she shut it… then she started to cry. It wasn't very loud, not even really anything above a whisper, but he heard it and it hurt him.

Then, the words that did it.

"The end."

With those two words he broke. As she turned around to leave, she heard the door and turned around frozen. There he was. He walked over to her and kissed her; with everything that she had kissed him with, and she returned it. When the kiss ended and she stood there winded and surprised, he whispered in her ear, "Maybe."

And with that, he went inside, because now that he had seen her, he needed to atone for his sins fast enough to return to her. And for once make someone happy.


End file.
